Pro Tips provided by Amy Armstrong, MSEd, BCBA

Throughout our lives, the amount of time we spend waiting is incalculable. We wait in line at the grocery store, we wait at the doctor’s office, we wait for our turn at a stop light. For individuals with autism, waiting can be especially difficult. With the tips below, you can help your child learn this important life skill.  

1. Recognize why waiting is hard. Impulse control, understanding time, and abstract thinking are often challenging for children with autism. Waiting requires self-control, which may be underdeveloped, and they may not understand how long they have to wait. 

2. Start small and build gradually. When you begin teaching your child how to wait for things they want, it’s best to choose a scenario in which they are going to be most successful. Practice in low stakes situations such as playing with a lesser preferred toy. Acknowledge their communication, ask them to wait for an allotted time such as five seconds, then count the seconds out loud. Gradually increase the wait interval as the child achieves success.  

3. Provide alternatives or distractions. If a child has nothing to do while they’re waiting, it makes it much more challenging for them to wait appropriately. Provide alternative activities they can engage in such as counting, singing a song, or playing with a toy. For long periods of time, like holidays or vacations, use countdown calendars or other visuals to make the waiting process less abstract.  

4. Praise every success. Provide praise and other immediate positive reinforcement across a variety of settings, whether it’s waiting for their turn at the playground or waiting for food to arrive at a restaurant. 

Progress can be slow when teaching patience. It’s also important to remember that every child is different — what works for one may not work for another. But with consistency, structure, and the right strategies, your child can build the skills needed to wait and develop better emotional regulation in the process.